Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Jesus needed a lucy

those are the sweet words spoken by molly to my dad in the hospital waiting room before lucy was delivered. too young to really comprehend, but she knew that lucy was going to live with Jesus in heaven. i know many of you are wondering what in fact happened almost 2 weeks ago on sunday, july 10th. here's lucy's story.

saturday night was much like any other, lucy was active after dinner, not as much as usual, but she was still moving. i went to sleep and woke up sunday morning around 6 and never felt her move. this was unusual because she always moved as soon as i woke up. i tried eating sugar, jiggling my stomach, drinking water. still nothing. i got dressed and went to church still concerned. i was having some contractions but they weren't painful or regular. around 11:00 a.m. she still hadn't moved so i called my doctor. my doctor didn't seem too concerned but asked me to come to the hospital where she was at so they could hook me up to the monitor to check things out. the nurses tried finding a heartbeat and couldn't and then called my doctor for a sonogram. i saw my sweet baby motiononless in my womb and knew it was bad news when she called another doctor in just to be sure. lucy in fact had died and i was soon preparing to go into the operating room. matt and i were devestated but tried to remain calm and thankful for what we had.

lucy was born at 2:41p.m. weighing 9 lbs 6 oz and was 20 inches long. she was a beautiful little girl and a great mix of molly and sophie. there was no question they were sibblings. lucy's cord had been thinned, probably because of a kink, and that put her into stress. she most likely swallowed too much meconium. the next few hours were spent with family holding our precious little girl. matt left the hospital about 8 p.m. to be with molly and sophie and i took full advantage of my time alone with my daughter. i held my baby all night, just as i would have if she would have been alive. saying good bye was the hardest thing i ever hope i have to go through in my life.

my life has forever changed and it's not an easy rode to go down. some days are good, others are not. a part of me is missing however, i must remain strong in the promise that my hope is in the Lord. i will see my lucy again one day and spend eternity with her. right now, she's in the best place, our Savior's arms. the Bible says for the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ. we can't save ourselves, no matter how good we are or how many good deeds we do, how many times we go to church or donate money to charity, no of this matters unless we've come to the realization that it is only through a belief in Christ that we will go to heaven. not by works of righteousness which we have done but according to His mercy He saved us. believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and you will be saved. my friends, you must come to a point in your life where you admit to Christ that you are a sinner and need His saving grace and ask Him to come and live in your heart and be Lord of your life and then and only then will you spend eternity in heaven. it's my prayer that little lucy will impact the lives of others and bring them to the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ.


  1. I am brought to tears again. You put it beautifully. I too know that our Heavenly Father and Lord Jesus Christ love and watch out for the little ones. They are taken care of, even when they are taken far too soon. I also know that our Savior Jesus Christ atoned for us all that we can be forgiven our shortcomings and sins, saved from death, and comforted in our sorrows. But that knowledge doesn't make me wish you didn't have to experience this heartache. I truly admire the way you are meeting this trial with faith and hope. I too believe little Lucy is waiting in comfort to dwell with you eternally. Love you so much.

  2. I am also moved to tears. Beautifully written about your beautiful baby girl.

  3. We were so moved by how you taken this devastating circumstance and turned it around for His glory! Your trust in the sovereignty of God is such an encouragement! Praying for grace and strength to help you through it all!


  4. Hey lady!

    I awarded your blog the Butterfly award over at my blog. Check it out here:

  5. Thank you Amber for having the courage to post your story. I have had my own loss but I still really can't imagine what your family has been through. I am so thankful that the Lord has put you in mine and Josh's family. It helps me to know that you are someone who truely understands.